What does support look like?

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A friend is experiencing stress and frustration because the way someone is trying to be supportive of her doesn’t work for her. Instead of feeling supported, important, valued, and inspired – she feels uninspired, frustrated, and not believed in. Whether this someone is a boss, upline, parent, friend, spouse, co-worker, etc. – this is not […]

Superior Strategy

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If something is worth beating yourself up for not doing – then it must be worth celebrating for doing. So, isn’t it strange that we do the former but not the latter? How about if we switch that around and quit the beating up part and instead get good at the celebrating part. That seems like […]

I double dog dare you to answer this question

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So often the questions we ask ourselves orient us in the 180 degree wrong direction. We ask ourselves questions like: “How come no one wants to do business with me?” This question is almost certain to lead us to a distorted perspective that has us feel lousy about ourselves and doesn’t offer any real solutions. […]

Not Supported

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People often have a disempowering story about not being supported. So imagine this: you’ve just finished telling your story about how you are not being supported and then you turn to your left and see God sitting there. – Awkward!!!! If we do indeed live in a friendly universe, then we are always being supported. […]

Using Emotions To Grow Yourself

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Emotions mean that something is important to us. By simply getting curious about “what here is important to me” when we are experiencing a negative emotion, we can already begin to diffuse a negative emotion. We move out of reactive consciousness and into witness or observer consciousness. We can then also learn about ourselves and […]

Out of Control Optimism

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Optimism is a good thing. But when optimism becomes mandatory, when people have it that there is no other option but to be optimistic, optimism can cause real problems. There is a fine line between optimism and delusion. When we have to be optimistic, we cannot see what we need to see. We cannot see […]

Kryptonite Thinking

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There are all kinds of lousy thoughts that can stop us as dead in our tracks as kryptonite stops superman. If I label something as “not fun” I most likely will not do it or at least will avoid it as long as possible. If I’m not careful, the small not fun thing can easily […]

Is it worth it?

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Sometimes all we need to do is ask ourselves this question: Is it worth it? Is it worth it to get upset? Is it worth it to worry? Is it worth it to get down on myself? Is it worth it to compare myself to others? Is it worth it to hang onto my anger? […]

Expectations Often Come From Limitations

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When we stop and examine our expectations, we often find that they are more limitations than expectations. We expect that we cannot hit that number because we haven’t hit it before – but what if we can! We expect that it has to take a long time – but what if it doesn’t! We expect […]

If it isn’t possible . . .

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I talked with a couple of people today who had “it isn’t possible” going on. If it isn’t possible then taking any sort of action in that direction is simply foolish. Why would we bother if there’s no chance of it working out? It is so important that we check in on “is it possible” […]

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