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Are You Good Enough?

by Jonathan

April 11th, 2009

Are You Good Enough?

I have yet to meet someone who does not have some version of “I’m not good enough” going on inside their head. It seems to be part of the human experience.

Variations of “I’m not good enough” include: “I’m not okay”, “I’m not enough”, “Something is wrong with me”, “I don’t measure up”, “I’m not as good as”, “I cannot do/be like that” etc.

The majority of our struggles and suffering stem from this poor opinion of ourselves.

This usually shows up one of two ways:

1) We do things in order to prove this opinion wrong. The problem with this is that this self opinion is much deeper than any doing. We can do and do and it does not change the self opinion. Plus, when we do things in order to prove, there is always an underlying anger. This has physical, mental and emotional consequences.

2) We move into resignation and apathy. We don’t even try because we know we are not good enough anyway so why bother.

So, the bad news is that you have this negative self opinion. The good news is that any decrease in the amount of this negative self opinion results in an increase in your quality of life. (Read on to see how to do that).

What If?

These two words ~ “what if” ~ just might be the most powerful words in the English language. “What if” can turn any situation around. These words offer possibility, change and hope. They create curiosity, wonder and space for change.

You can use “what if” every time you catch yourself falling into that habitual negative self opinion. “What if I am good enough?” “What if I am already okay?”

Say these words right now and notice how your body responds. It is very freeing.

“What if” takes away all the strength of the negative self opinion. That is powerful stuff!

Milton Erickson

Milton Erickson is the man who made hypnotherapy famous. He was also an amazing healer. One of the things he was noted for was his use of stories, which through humor, shock, surprise or confusion helped his clients see their situation in a new way. (I highly recommend “My Voice Will Go With You: the teaching tales of Milton H Erickson” by Sidney Rosen).

One day Milton was brought into a prison to work with some of the inmates.

One young man was bad news. He was in prison for violent crimes and he was a problem inmate.

The only thing Milton said to him was, “What if you woke up tomorrow and everything was different.”

The other doctors who were observing Milton thought that this guy was too tough for even Milton.

Shortly thereafter, the young man’s behavior changed. He became a model prisoner and ended up getting released early for good behavior. He got married, had kids and became a productive member of society. All this from one “what if”.

What if?????

Categories Mindset and Attitude
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How To Overcome Self Sabotage In Sales

by Jonathan

April 6th, 2009

How To Overcome Self Sabotage In Sales

The reality is that if you are in business, you are in sales. The better you are at sales, the better your business will go.

Do you want to sell in a way that honors and respects your prospect AND leaves you feeling alive, inspired and good about yourself? If yes, then the How To Overcome Self-Sabotage in Sales teleseminar series is definitely for you.

Is your sales approach more perspiration than inspiration?

· Does the word “sales” fill you with dread?
· Do you think selling is hard or demeaning?
· Do you have a hard time asking for the sale?
· Do you have trouble thinking of yourself as being in sales?
· Have you felt abused by sales people and do not want to do the same?

Answering yes to any of these most likely means that you are working hard and not getting the results you desire. You are in your own way of success.

This program will accelerate your career and catalyze your success – with much less perspiration and more inspiration.

I guarantee that you will be more effective and more comfortable in sales after this program! If you are not 100% satisfied with the program, your tuition will be cheerfully refunded.

With that promise, all you need to do is ask yourself: are you ready to transform your relationship to sales?

To register contact Jonathan Manske at 303.552.7285 or jonathan@jonathanmanske.com

Program details for the How To Overcome Self-Sabotage in Sales program.

What: Three One-hour teleseminars

Dates: Wednesdays April 15, 22 & 29

Time: 6:30 – 7:30pm MST, 8:30 – 9:30pm EST

Location: Teleseminar

Tuition: $79.00

Categories Mindset and Attitude
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Check Writing Resistance

by Jonathan

April 6th, 2009

Check Writing Resistance

As you might have noticed, our society is insane around the topic of money right now.

Predictions of gloom and doom are rampant. Scarcity and lack are the mindset of the day. Hoarding and imaging worst case scenarios are popular new hobbies.

Here’s a common business owner scenario: “Okay, I’m not going to spend any money for anything!!! ~ but I sure hope lots of people continue to buy from me.” Does that seem perhaps a tad bit illogical?

People are forgetting an important universal law ~ “What you focus on is what you get, whether it is what you want or what you do not want.”

Get off the terror train. Just because all the lemmings are running for the edge of the cliff does not mean it is the right thing to do!

Start focusing on what you want. Stop engaging in talk about how bad business is, about how bad the economy is. Just stop!

More millionaires were created during the great depression than at any other time in our history. Opportunities abound right now but you will never see them if you are focused on what is wrong.

OK enough of my rant and back to my topic:

Check Writing Reluctance

The other day I was talking with a client and he mentioned how reluctant his potential clients were to writing a check. They were very interested in his service but somehow it was hard to write that check.

It hit me. Well of course it is hard to write a check these days. Mass consciousness is squarely stuck in scarcity and fear. Then I realized that I had check writing reluctance too. I’d been dragging my feet about paying my bills. I’d pay them at the last possible moment. I didn’t want to write that check. I’d been infected by mass consciousness.

The good news is there is something you can do about this insanity in mass consciousness. You can create a safe haven where people can step out of the storm for a bit and catch their breath, catch their perspective.

Here’s how you do this:

1) Both visualize and intend that the person you are interacting with is inside a bubble. (I make the bubble pink because pink brings in heart energy. And, if it feels appropriate to use another colour, do so.)
2) Intend that the surface of the bubble is selective. It lets in good energy and thoughts and keeps out the negative.
3) Intend that the negative already inside the bubble is dissolved by the pink light.
4) That is it! Now give them space to make their decision.

What you have done there is you have created a buffer, a quiet space where that person can make a decision that is the right one for them without the pressure of mass consciousness. Whether they buy from you or not, you have given them a valuable gift (a respite from the insanity of mass consciousness).

Although very simple, this technique is very powerful. I have seen it literally change lives.

Wishing you great joy and success,

Jonathan Manske

Categories Law of Attraction, Mindset and Attitude
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Taking Orders From a Mindless Idiot

by Jonathan

February 17th, 2009

Taking Orders From a Mindless Idiot

There is nothing like taking orders from a mindless idiot to
put your mind at ease. source unknown

(I don’t remember where I heard this or who it came from. I do remember that it was in reference to serving in the army.)

Overwhelm: It’s part of being alive. Sometimes we have so much to do that we get overwhelmed. Typically when this happens we start to spin our mental wheels which makes us even less productive. When this happens, it is time to put a mindless idiot in charge.

Imagine being a lowly private in the army. If the sergeant tells you to go to the kitchen and peel potatoes, guess what you do? You go to the kitchen and peel potatoes. You do not have a discussion with the sergeant about how your talents are best suited to other enterprises or what you would prefer to do. You go peel potatoes until you are told to do something different.

If you relax into this, your mind experiences ease. You don’t need to worry or think about what you need to do next or about what else you should be doing right now. Plain and simple – your world is peeling potatoes.

Well, you don’t have to be in the army to experience the ease of taking orders from a mindless idiot. You can purchase a mindless idiot at any grocery store. It is called a kitchen timer.

Then the next time you experience overwhelm, you can cede your power to the mindless idiot. Make the timer your boss.

Imagine that you need to follow up with some prospects, schedule some appointments, answer emails, write a proposal, pay some bills, clean your desk and . . . all of a sudden you are feeling overwhelmed.

Pick one of your items (calling prospects) and then set the mindless idiot aka the timer for 20 minutes. Now you know what you are supposed to be doing for the next 20 minutes. Until the timer buzzes, you are calling prospects.

If another idea comes up, set it aside because right now the mindless idiot has instructed you to call prospects.

After the timer rings, pick another task and then repeat.

An added bonus to this is: completions/goal achieving. Every time the timer rings, you have set and achieved a goal.

Imagine that you have a big task at hand, one that is less than exciting – eg organizing your receipts for taxes.

If you use your mindless idiot, you can have several completions along the way – versus just grinding the task out. These mini-completions will give you more energy to complete your task.

Wishing you great joy and success,

Jonathan Manske

Categories Mindset and Attitude
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What others are saying about you says more about them than it does about you.

by Jonathan

February 10th, 2009

What others are saying about you says more about them than it does about you.

“Sticks and stones may break my bones
but words will never hurt me.”

Although this sounds good in theory, it often breaks down in practice. We have all been hurt by words.

A friend of mine recently delivered a program to fifty people. Forty nine of the evaluations were very positive. One evaluation was critical. Guess which one my friend focused on? Not surprisingly, the critical words hurt.

Undoubtedly you have done this same thing, focused on a minority negative opinion. Consequently you have been hurt by words.

What we often forget is that the words that come out of a person’s mouth, say a lot about them. Who are they being and thinking that they see the world that way?

I can look out my window right now and say, “Wow, it looks like a wonderful day.” I can also say, ” Uhhmm, it looks cold out.” It is the same day!

These two different mindsets/perspectives will create two very different starts to my day. The first fills me with optimism and good feelings. The second fills me with wanting to go back to bed.

These two sentences also comment on the state of my being. I’m either being optimistic or pessimistic.

Back to my friend: I invited him to consider what the negative review said about the person who gave that review. Who was the reviewer being that she would see the world that way? What was going on in her that she would say the things she did?

My friend got it. That review didn’t have anything to do with him and yet he was taking it personally. (Now obviously this would be different if the majority of the reviews were negative. Then he should take a look at himself.) All of a sudden the words did not hurt anymore.

Action steps

Whenever you experience being hurt by words, stop and ask yourself, ” Is this saying something about me or about them?”

If it is saying something about them, why would you take it personally?

Chances are that if you see it is saying something about them, you will move into compassion rather than hurt.

Wishing you great joy and success!

Jonathan Manske

Categories Mindset and Attitude
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365 Days of Exercise – A goal worth shooting for

by Jonathan

January 26th, 2009

My good friend and fabulous business coach Mattison Grey www.greystoneguides was on my radio show last Thursday (Jonathan Manske’s Success Show).

Our topic was: The Top 5 Reasons Why People Do Not Achieve Their Goals. (The radio show is archived at http://www.realcoachingradio.com/node/69. It is the January 22 show.)

During the course of the show Mattison mentioned a goal she had just set for herself: To exercise for 365 days in a row – no ifs, ands, buts or excuses!

I was completely inspired by this game/goal that Mattison had created and told her, “I am in!”

Since then it has grown. Other people are playing. Do you want to play? If so send me an email at contact me and let me know that “you are in”.

Wishing you great joy and success,

Jonathan Manske

Categories Mindset and Attitude, real coaching radio
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A Cure for The Shoulds

by Jonathan

January 6th, 2009

A Cure for The Shoulds

If you are a breathing human being, there is a very good chance that you have pressured yourself using the words: should, must and/or need to.

There is also a very good chance that you do this on a regular basis.

Every time that you do this, your quality of life takes a hit, your vitality decreases, your resistance increases and you pressure yourself. (The only thing that thrives on pressure is a tire.)

In general, people do not like to be told what to do and any time they are told what to do, there is a flare of resistance. This is true even if it is you telling yourself what to do.

Should, must and need to are very compulsive words that make you lose perspective. As soon as you use these words, you lose options and choice.

Rather than trying to quit “shoulding” which would be hard work since this is an established habit, let’s use this habit strategically.

Every time that you catch yourself using should, must or need to have that be a wake up call. “Oh I’m stuck in a habit here.” Then change that word to “could”. “Could” allows you to explore, to evaluate your options and make a decision that serves you rather than a decision determined by compulsion and pressure.

Then you can choose to do it or to not do it. And, if you choose not to do it there won’t be any guilt.

Wishing you great joy and success,

Jonathan Manske

Categories Mindset and Attitude, Non-Conscious Programming
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2009: The Year of Living ____________ ?

by Jonathan

January 5th, 2009

2009: The Year of Living ____________ ?

Rather than a New Year’s Resolution that quickly fades, how about choosing a theme for the entire year?

For me, 2009 is The Year of Living Boldly!

This is the measuring stick against which I get to measure my plans, actions and decisions for the entire year. I get to ask myself, “Is this consistent with living boldly?”

What’s your theme for the year?

This idea comes from my friend Dave Bravdica www.flavorcator.com.

You can hear Dave talk about this on the archives of Jonathan Manske’s Success Show on www.realcoachingradio.com.

Here’s the link to my page http://www.rcrn.info/profile/JonathanManske where you can find that show (9-18-08: Mr Eat, Pray Love) in “my music” in the left column.

Wishing you great joy and success,

Jonathan Manske

Categories Mindset and Attitude, real coaching radio
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What Scrooge Knew About Play

by Jonathan

December 11th, 2008

What Scrooge Knew About Play

This quote was provided by Barbara Brannen http://www.letsplaymore.com

: Image via Wikipedia

Barbara was my guest today on Jonathan Manske’s Inevitable Success Radio Show. Our topic was: How Play Makes You Successful. This fabulous show is archived at www.realcoachingradio.com/node/69

This quote comes from Scrooge when he is with the Ghost of Christmas Past and has a realization about the impact we can have on each other.

“He has the power to render us happy or unhappy; to make our service light or burdensome; a pleasure or a toil. Say that his power lies in words and looks; in things so slight and insignificant that it is impossible to add and count them up; what then? The happiness he gives is quite as great as if it cost a fortune.”

Quoted from Scrooge in A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens, 1907

What a great take on leadership – the power to render happy or unhappy – This would apply to leadership at work, at home, in the community . . .

When we play and are playful we contribute to all those around us.

Wishing you great joy and success,

Jonathan Manske

Categories real coaching radio
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Heart Centered Leadership on the Inevitable-Success Show – November 13, 2008

by Jonathan

November 17th, 2008

Heart Centered Leadership on the Inevitable-Success Show – November 13, 2008

Interview with Susan Steinbrecher, Institute of Heart-Centered Leadership

on www.realcoachingradio.com

My guest on today’s show was Susan Steinbrecher, the founder of the Institute of Heart-Centered Leadership and author of Heart Centered Leadership: An Invitation to Lead from the Inside Out.

Her company, Steinbrecher and Associates, Inc., provides custom-designed training programs, leadership retreats and executive coaching. Susan started this consulting business in the early ‘90s after spending about 14 years in the hospitality industry. However, even with a successful track record, Susan had an obstacle to overcome in starting her own business. Fear.

For Susan, her rapid rise in the hospitality industry was really the catalyst for her decision to start her own business. Tapping into her early experience as a young manager, she learned how challenging it was to motivate employees to do their best. As she progressed up the corporate ladder, she learned a great deal more about leadership and motivating associates. Conquering her fears, she turned that expertise into something she wanted to share with the world … and you.

Think about what Susan said and how it applies to your own business:

“If you take excellent care of your associates, they will take great care of your customers which will have a positive impact on your company’s productivity … and profitability.”

This just makes good sense.

Heart Centered Leadership strives to counter the negative impact of chasing profitability first and foremost. That’s because minimizing the importance of associates ultimately means less attention given to customers which results in the pain you will feel the most – its impact on your bottom line. This begs the question – how can you motivate your associates?

At one point in her research, Susan asked people to think about the best boss they ever had. Now, she acknowledged that it was a broad question, so she also asked what that person did or said and what kind of an impact it had. Most people thought of someone within 15-20 seconds. And it wasn’t that boss’s expertise at strategy or planning or budgeting that they remembered – it was the way that boss made them feel. Valued. I think it’s all about the experience their favorite boss created, because leaders need to create the right environment for people to thrive. This involves developing an emotional climate that resonates with people.

So, what is Heart Centered Leadership (HCL)? According to Susan, HCL is actually defined as “someone who has the wisdom, courage and compassion to lead with authenticity, humility and service. Someone who speaks with authenticity, works collaboratively and has the courage to do the unpopular thing when necessary.”

To get you started, here are the Seven Principles and Virtues of Heart Centered Leadership:

Principles	Virtues (emotions to resonate)
Know thyself	Commitment to personal growth
Don’t judge and don’t assume – instead, come to understand	Open-minded
They need what you need	Authenticity
Letting go	Detachments
Know the impact of your words and actions	Integrity/foresight
Associates have a choice	Humility/humbleness
Care for the heart	Self-care/emotional health

There is much, much more to it, so I invite you to pick up Susan’s book. Here’s why:

Learn why people really quit – is it their job or you?
Discover that negativity is like a cancer that may spread throughout your organization.
Determine if your style of leadership is starving both you and your associates.
Explore the pitfalls that can derail your career or business.
Tap into the mental/physical energy that you need to be a successful leader.
Understand why employees are often disconnected from your vision.

I highly recommend Susan’s book. It’s an excellent gift for you or the leader in your life. It’s available at the Institute for Heart Centered Leadership’s website at www.instituteofhcl.org and Amazon.com, and you’ll receive a 20 percent discount by using the special code RNF2008. You can also read the Roadmap to Success by Susan and Stephen Covey and Ken Blanchard, with chapters from 15 different authors writing about what success means to them, also available at the Institute’s website.

I wish you all great joy and tremendous success in all that you do.

Jonathan Manske