But others will feel bad

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But others will feel badBut others will feel bad

“It is not okay for me to do well, get what I want, be happy, have a great relationship, have a thriving business, get skinny, etc. because then someone else (or someone in specific) will feel bad by comparison.”

This little piece of head trash is very common and very damaging. It puts us in the impossible position of being responsible for another person – their happiness, well-being, or success. And since we are not in control of their brain we cannot control how they think or what they think about so therefore we are doomed to failure when we try to be responsible for them.

This head trash also makes us into a bad person because it becomes our fault that this other person isn’t happy etc. (And of course this is a ridiculous lie but there is a part of our brains that does not know that this is a lie.) And therefore I surely cannot do even better because that would just make it worse for that other person. So now we are stuck in mediocrity.

If others choose to feel bad, that is their choice.

Then there are also the others (a much larger group) who will be inspired when we do well. Our doing well gives them permission to do the same.

Much Love,

 Jonathan
I write these Daily Doses because I know that my content does make a difference and helps people live better lives. So, if you know someone who would benefit from today’s thoughts, please pass this on. Thanks and gratitude in advance! 

photo credit: symphony of love Richard Bach If your happiness depends on what somebody else does, I guess you do have a problem via photopin (license)

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