The answer to that is YES! Happiness isn’t dependent on external circumstances. It is a choice we make independent of the circumstances (regardless of the severity of the circumstance).

We have the ability to be happy when circumstances say that we should not be happy. We also have the ability to be unhappy when circumstances say that we should be happy.

Related to this ~ Oftentimes when things don’t turn out the way we want, we tend to think that it is our fault. Sometimes it might be, but there are many times where we have done our job, but things didn’t turn out. In those cases, there’s nothing to feel bad or guilty about (we did our job!) and it is a mistake to make our happiness contingent on the outcome.

For example, ~ a loved one is going through a dark time and we have done our best to let them know that they are loved and supported and . . . but they remain in the darkness. It is not our fault. We are not in charge of their brain. We did our job and absolutely did not get the result that we wanted. If we now feel bad and forsake our happiness, we just make the situation worse.

Our darkness just adds to their darkness. Yes, we can be happy even when a loved one is in a dark place. We have that ability.

Is this easy? Probably not. Is it essential for our happiness, our peace of mind, our quality of life and for truly being useful to that other person? YES!