For Goodness Sake ~ Say Something Nice To Yourself

What I am writing about is probably not anything you haven’t heard about before. And, a little reminder can be very useful.

You cannot help but have self-talk. It is part of being a human being. Unfortunately, the vast majority of our self-talk is negative.

This negative self-talk is nothing more than a habit. We have learned how to do this from everyone around us.

The problem with the negative self-talk is that there is a part of us, our non-conscious, that believes everything it hears.

So whether I say to myself, “I am an idiot” or “I am a genius”, there is a part of me that believes this to be true.

Furthermore this then creates certain responses and feelings in me. Obviously one of these will make me feel better than the other.

Now the thing about habits is that they can be changed. What if you got into the habit of saying nice things about yourself? What if you got into the habit of catching the negative self-talk and immediately following it up with some positive self-talk?

Try it for a day! Today make a point of saying nice things to yourself throughout the day. This might feel strange or uncomfortable. Do it any way.

Try these on for starters:

* I am a genius!
* I am wonderful!
* I am a good person!
* I deserve to succeed!
* I am worth $500/ hour!
* I am happy!

When we make a mistake, we tend to follow it up with some negative self-talk. “I forgot to return my library books, now I have a late fee. I am such an idiot!!!”

What if instead you said, “I forgot to return my library books but at least I am an amazing human being.”

This produces a very different experience of you. One that is much more enjoyable and beneficial. Remember, there is a part of you that believes whatever you say.

My friend, Alecia Huck www.maverickandcompany.com, passes out buttons that say, “At least I’M HOT”.

Try that. “I didn’t convert this prospect into a customer but at least I’m hot!”

Take me up on this challenge. Talk nice to yourself today. If you like it, do it again tomorrow. Why not, you are hot and you deserve it!

Intending great joy and success for you,

Jonathan Manske

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Jekyll and Hyde

Have you ever had a Jekyll and Hyde experience?

If you are living human the answer to this is - Of Course!

A Jekyll and Hyde experience is when you have a plan or course of action that you know would be good for you and would support you and then you go and do something completely different, something that is not good for you and does not support you.

Dr. Jekyll makes a plan and then Mr. Hyde takes over and things go to heck.  This is when you usually say something like:  What the “bleep” just happened?  Or, you start asking why:  Why did I do that?  Why didn’t I do that?  And so on.

Jekyll says, ” I ought to exercise, I’ll go for a run.”  Then Hyde takes over and 3 beers later Jekyll is wondering why he didn’t go for the run and why he drank those beers.

Jekyll has a plan to call clients this afternoon and follow up with them.  Hyde takes over, the afternoon is wasted and no calls are made.  Jekyll wonders what the bleep happened and where did the afternoon go.

Jekyll is often frustrated because he has good intentions and knows that these things would be very valuable and beneficial - but they do not happen.

Jekyll is your conscious mind.  Hyde is your non-conscious mind.  Whenever these two are not in alignment, Jekyll ends up frustrated and Hyde ends up running the show.

You have tried to fight Hyde so you know from personal experience that this does not work.  Hyde is just too strong he overwhelms you and takes over.

So, what to do?

It’s not about Jekyll becoming stronger or having more willpower.  Hyde simply takes over and that is the end of Jekyll’s plans.

You need to explore what is going on beneath the surface.  You need to discover what is that button that is getting pushed that has Hyde surface and take over thus thwarting your good intentions.

Then you need to reprogram that button so that Hyde stays hidden, so that Hyde does not need to come to the surface to ruin the day.

One way to reprogram the button is to inquire into:  what is my fear, what is my resistance here that brings out Hyde?  Once you have identified this then you can recontextualize and reframe the situation which, will give you different access to it.

A client of mine had a really hard time asking for sales.  When it came time to ask for the sale, Hyde would appear and consequently she wouldn’t ask for the sale.  We did some recontextualizing and reframing.  She saw that her job was to inspire people and that asking for the sale was really asking if the prospect wanted to get inspired.  For her this was a very different question and it kept Hyde dormant.

If you are not sure what the button is, what triggers Hyde to show up feel free to contact me for a complimentary Business Mindset Analysis.

In the Business Mindset analysis we will spend 15 minutes and take a look at what is the invisible brick wall that you keep bumping into that keeps you from succeeding.  We will look at what is it that makes Hyde appear.

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A Walk With Money

Money!  That’s a topic that is seldom far from people’s minds.

How do I get more of it?

How do I get my money to work for me?

How do I make myself attractive to money?

Your relationship with money, whether good or bad, whether fulfilling or unfulfilling, is primarily determined by what is going on beneath the surface in your non-conscious.

Here is an easy exercise to get a sense of your non-conscious relationship to money.  Once you know the status of that relationship then you can take steps to improve it.

Imagine that you are walking along a path in the park and that money is also walking in the park.

Where is money walking?  Is it even on the same path as you are on?  If it is on your path, is it walking the same direction you are?  If money is walking the same direction as you are, is there connect between you two or even some intimacy?

The Goal

Our end goal is to have you and money walking down the path together, hand in hand - close, connected and intimate.

This visual exercise is something that you want to work with over time and start to change, modify and move towards the end goal.

The Steps

#1 You have to start where you are.  If you and money are on different paths then that is where you start.  If you and money are on the same path but ignoring each other then that is where you start.

#2 Start taking small steps to change the situation.  If you and money are on different paths, invite money to come walk on your path or go walk on money’s path.  If you and money are ignoring each other, start to  <!– /* Style Definitions */ p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal {mso-style-parent:""; margin:0in; margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:12.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";} h1 {margin-right:0in; mso-margin-top-alt:auto; mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; margin-left:0in; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; mso-outline-level:1; font-size:24.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-font-kerning:18.0pt; font-weight:bold;} h3 {margin-right:0in; mso-margin-top-alt:auto; mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; margin-left:0in; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; mso-outline-level:3; font-size:13.5pt; font-family:"Times New Roman"; font-weight:bold;} p {margin-right:0in; mso-margin-top-alt:auto; mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto; margin-left:0in; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:12.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family:"Times New Roman";} @page Section1 {size:8.5in 11.0in; margin:1.0in 1.25in 1.0in 1.25in; mso-header-margin:.5in; mso-footer-margin:.5in; mso-paper-source:0;} div.Section1 {page:Section1;} –> surreptitiously flirt with money.

#3 Be patient, take your time, take small steps.  You wouldn’t get off your path, cross the park and get on another path to give an attractive complete stranger an exuberant bear hug.  Hopefully you would be a little bit cooler and smoother about this.  Make small changes.

As you do these things, you are building a relationship with money and a stronger connection to money.  The ripples of this can be profound.